Like everyone? I wanted to be the same - and learned to dislike this part of me. It always had sexual overtones - but I had no idea what the hell those things were until I started masturbating. Then I gradually started going out with girls. I liked them just fine - and had some like me in return. The only thing was? I was submissive - and they had been brought up in the same society - a man should be dominant. I had NO idea what to do. Ended up with the total embarrassment of sometimes having a girl, ready and willing - while I had no idea of how to continue. Awful.
So, the mild dislike I had for myself, turned into self loathing. Can't say that I was a nice person. Used to wonder and wonder when this 'want' of mine would go away. In my Thirties? Forties? Later?
Well? If any of you wonder the same thoughts? Accept the fact that they will NOT disappear with age. I've had a fairly successful life - and a long marriage. Have been retired for over 20 years (I did retire fairly early). But until about five years back, the urgings remained the same. Medications for Prostate Cancer finally did them in - they basically emasculate them.
All I can say? I miss the urgings. Wanted rid of them for many years - but once you lose them? Keep in mind the old saying - "Be careful of your dreams - they may come true".
At this point I want to add that I feel that I started to become a fairly nice person - once I learned to LIKE myself - or at least admit that I had nothing to be abhorrent about. That took quite a few years - but trust me, it's become almost a mantra. If you're simply a transvestite or male submissive? You're fine. Start liking yourself.
Well, enough of my BS I guess. Here's the story,