Monday, May 30, 2011

Jet Lag Musings

Just making it back to normal - sleepwise.  This mornig was awakened by a family of coyotes exulting as they killed something (Strange, but three or four coyotes can sound like a full choir) and the screams were most unpleasant.  My own dog sleeps in our bedroom,  Doesn't bark much  - but let out a fierce WOOF!  Then it took her about five minutes to get back to sleeep, growling under her breath the whole time. So?  This woke me and after an hour or so, I thought I'd make a few comments.  Here I am.

That competition of Belinda's?

Years ago, I thought a transvestite was a transvestite, was a transvestite.  A Popeye "I yam whatI yam" sort of thing.  But now I'm amazed by the diversity of sissies like us, who like to dress up in girl clothes.

Don't laugh - but I'm not even sure now if I AM a transvestite. (Or WAS).  I wanted to be humiliated - by a woman,  Period. Humiliation was being FORCED to dress up - and I derived a great deal of sexual enjoyment from the thought of the humiliation involved.  My serial started yesterday does have a rare male appearing - but mostly, I wanted to be put down by a female, in front of other females.  Males played little part in my fantasies.

To attend a party like Belinda's voluntarily?  Out of the bloody question. But to be MADE?  Oh grief!  The humiliaton would have been wonderful!

Some years ago, I was introduced to the concept that males who enjoyed dressing fell into two main categories - Transvestites and Cross dressers.  I thought this total bullshit - and said so.  At the same time, I met (through my writing) some exceptionally nice males who just felt comfortable in maid uniforms and doing housewifely chores - WITHOUT sexual release?  Let's face it - not something I even considered - I dressed and imagined fantasies and masturbated.  These guys were just kidding themselves,  hiding from their true natures.

 But later on, after my children had grown up and moved away?  I wore panties at all times.  Nightdresses as well,  Sometimes even camisoles. Never jacked off - just felt comfortable in women's lingerie.  So, had I become a cross dresser?  Later, when Prostate Cancer caused me to take special injections. I lost the desire altogther,  (I had worked voluntarily with 2nd grade children for about fourteen years - and the thought of being 'caught' now - without any enjoyment - made me stop completely.  I'm well aware that to the 'straight' people that transvestism is considered wildly perverted - and aware of the horrible thought that might affect the teachers I'd worked with - so saw no sense in continuing).

Which leads me to another point.  What does one DO with lingerie that has been worn - and jacked off in?  My high heels were easy.  Just dumped them off in a Goodwill bin.  But lingerie?   It's clean of course?  But the thought of giving this stuff to some poor woman doesn't thrill me at all. Have a full drawer of the bloody stuff.

Which leads me to another point.  I'm delighted with this blog.  I'm attempting to create a meeting place for men who like to dress up, but coming up with other viewpoints?  God bless Belinda, Tammie, and Monica. I need all of the help I can get.  That idea of mine with putting on a serial?   Bloody ego-deflating is all I can say - though I intend to finish the story up.  (I mean - I'm no Vicky Tern - but three or four out of 400?  Good grief!)

So?  I have another idea.  Don't know if this appeals to anyone - but I have two nice dresses - well, a caftan and a dress.  The caftan is brand new - my wife bought it for me just before I decided to drop women's clothes.  The dress I bought from a transvestite store of used dresses. I put it on once - too small.  Never messed it up in any way.  If I get any interest shown in my idea?  I'll post photos of them on this blog.

My idea?  Have two competitions with one prize given for the winner of each.  I thought of one competition for short (one page max) TV or Cross Dressing stories or articles that I'd publish here on the blog - then award the prize based on reader polls.  The other?  I have no idea, but thoughts would be welcomed.

But I DO have to have some interest shown by clicking the poll at the bottom of this post.  Upo to now, I feel that I'm batting a 1000 in lousy ideas.  Any help would be welcomed.

Bea

5 comments:

rocketdave said...

If it's lack of reader feedback you're annoyed by, I think that's a common problem. I may post a well-liked drawing to deviantART, but I'm lucky if I get one comment for every hundred people who view it, and many of those are among the generic, unhelpful "Good job" variety.

I probably couldn't be considered a crossdresser or a transvestite. I mean, I've only sort of crossdressed once, and that was last Halloween. I guess I've had an interest in the forced feminization thing, on and off, for almost as far back as I can remember, but I've never really analyzed what the attraction is for me. Males definitely never played a part in my fantasies, though. I suppose that's why I never bought "Dolly," and now I'm doubly glad I didn't, if only because now I get to read it for free. I do look forward to the rest.

belinda said...

Hi Bea. Sorry your vacation wasn't everything you wanted. I am enjoying Dolly very much and looking forward to more. I think a in depth discussion of forced femme would be quite interesting. May I ask what size is the dress?

Johnny said...

Bea, I was a fan of your old web-site from a few years ago. I am (or was)a submissive transvestite. I married a lovely lady (just tom-boy and feminine enough) who enjoyed her power over me when dressed-up. She has grown with me over the years. (40 of them to be exact.) I am now disabled and suffer from E.D. I enjoy reading your stories about women forcing fem, onto hapless males...I just cannot physically DO anything. Mentally, I am very aroused, but I can't express it. Soooooo, I am telling you that your stories pack one hell of a punch, even to those of us who cannot feel it!

Angiecdnj said...

Bea
I think the story competiton is a good idea. I.creasing the number of followers is difficult but sometimes quality is better than quantity.

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