Sunday, September 4, 2011
A few comments - and part 5 of the serial.
Don't know about you, but I read a lot. (Getting more and more housebound by my health - and need something to do). I don't consider myself sentimental - but I am a sucker for certain things, and every so often a book comes along that knocks me on my ass. Just finished one: "Horse Boy" by Rupert Isaacson. It's about a sort of mystical approach taken by two parents who have an austistic boy. It may be exaggerated - I don't think so - but don't know for certain - just know that had me weepy a few times. Makes me think - and very, very, glad that my two boys weren't autistic!.
I've converted a few more of my stories to books on Lulu. I'm now starting to see that downloading is the way to go, so as I now have five - and more coming on the way, you might want to take a look. They're under Gay and Lesbian. (Which kind of pisses me off because I'm neither.) I'm now putting two stories into each book and, if you're that way inclined? Downloading is cheap - and if there's a sale on? Even cheaper. I'm also looking at putting my stuff on epub type formats - for Kindle, Ipod, and a whole bunch of other stuff. Bloody fascinating! (Told you I have to be doing 'something'!)
I'm hoping that my serials are enjoyable to you all. I'm not looking for compliments or comments - I'm learning - but it is kind of ego-deflating at times, and I'm never very sure. But anyway? Here it is:
Real Husbands Don’t Cry
"Ooooh! Dreadful!" She laughed. "But if you have no suggestions, I've been thinking about something?" With that, she dug into a dressing table drawer and pulled out some yellow, satiny, fabric. "Put these pajamas of for tonight, would you darling?" and she handed them to me.
"I . .I . . I . ." I was stammering frightfully, the material slithering in my hands.
She pursed her lips, but there was a smile lurking behind the sternness. "Steffi? Do as I say, will you? I know that I told you how much I adore humiliating you – but honestly? I just want to get you into bed. So don't be a naughty pansy dear. Just do as Joan asks you to – okay? Put your nice pajamas on. They're a nice yellow – and you KNOW how much I like you in that color."
I could feel any strength I had disappearing. "Do I have to, Joan?"
She smiled. "That reminds me. Evelyn was telling me that she and Veronica often indulge in some play spanking as foreplay before sex."
The sudden change of subject floored me. "Huh?"
She continued to smile but there was no warmth in it. "I'd like us to do that. Wouldn't it be fun? I'm thinking that you could ask Veronica how to set it up. You know – how to ask. How to act. That sort of thing. Doesn't it sound like it would be really enjoyable?"
"But Joan? I don't understand!"
She sighed theatrically. "Sweetie? I'm trying to get it across to you that I think that spanking you – putting you across my knees? Would be a lot of fun or I should say 'could' be a lot of fun for both of us. But if you keep arguing with me – being negative all the time? I might have to spank you right now – and as I'm not in the mood? It wouldn't be so much fun for you as you'd probably cry again – and I'm not in the mood for that at all. So why don't you get your pajamas on, huh?"
* * *
I woke up the following morning, pleasantly drowsy, with my eyelids particularly heavy. Smiled a contented smile to myself. Joan was snoring slightly. I laughed to myself. There was no sense in telling her that she snored now and then as she simply refused to believe that she did such a thing.
For a second, I wondered if I needed to get up, then remembered it was a Saturday. No hurry. None at all. Yawned, put my forearm across my eyes.
Oh GOD! What was this? A yellow satin sleeve? Then I could feel the blood surge to my face as the memories surged into my brain from what had happened the night before. How I'd been so weak and pliant in agreeing with my wife as she stroked and caressed me that I loved my pajamas and got all erotic at the feel of them – and yes, I must have some pansy blood in me as she treated me like her woman – and I blushed a fiery red as I remembered mewling happily underneath her as she strode me and rode up and down on my erection unmercifully, howling and yowling as she did so.
"Took you long enough to wake up!" I heard her whisper. "Enjoy last night?" Her hand stroked my rump under the satin. "Hi sweetheart!" she crooned before I could answer. "Like to do Big Joan a great favor?" Her hand moved to stroke my breast and I felt the stirrings of another erection. "Love to." I whispered.
"You're SO cute!" she whispered in my ear and kissed my cheek. "So would you go quick – like a bunny – downstairs and pour Joan a hair of the dog? I think I drank too much last night!"
"I thought you had!" I giggled. "Scotch?"
"What else? And would you please hurry?"
"Okay. Just let me change . .."
"Bullshit! I like you in those jimmies. There's a matching robe in the closet!"
"But Eileen will see . ."
I'd be lying if I said that I didn't like the sensuous feel of the satin against my skin or the erotic feel of the robe sliding and slithering up against the pajamas. Both the robe and the pajamas were fairly plain cut with few frills and furbelows, but the matching slippers that Joan made me put on embarrassed me. There was absolutely no question of what gender they had been made for. The yellow satin material was bad enough, but the ruby-like beads that trimmed the aprons of the slippers were a touch much. The heels, although they weren't anything appreciable were also another facet that embarrassed me.
I was hoping to avoid Eileen, but that was asking too much I guess. When I got downstairs, I went immediately to the bar even though I heard some rattling in the kitchen and knew it had to be her. But on the way back, my tray in hand with Joan's drink on it, Eileen came out into the hallway. Her eyes widened at the sight of me.
"It's Joan's idea." Was the only explanation I could think of.
"Yes. I guess that she likes you in that color?"
"Mmmm. Have to take a drink up to her."
"Yes. I thought she'd had a little too much to drink. Want me to start breakfast?"
"Thanks. I don't know about Joan, but I'll be down shortly." With that, I headed upstairs.
Joan took the drink gratefully. Drank a good chunk of it immediately. Sighed in appreciation." Was that you and Eileen talking I heard?"
"Yeah. We talked just for a second."
"Like your outfit?" She was quite casual.
"Liked the color I think. I explained that you liked it on me."
She cocked her head and smiled. "Didn't comment on the fact that you were wearing women's clothes – a full outfit of women's clothes?"
"No. Not really."
"Good! Let's all go downstairs and have breakfast – now?"
"You still want me in these?" I asked, plucking at my robe helplessly.
"May as well get used to it darling. Let's go."
She obviously had something on her mind as the pair of us went downstairs as she called Eileen, who appeared as we reached the bottom. After greeting her, Joan said that she had something she wanted to say and felt that this was the proper time and place. She didn't mind us all getting mugs of coffee though, then had us all sit around the kitchen table.
"I've been thinking Eileen," she started. "About the advice you've given me – about how I had to make my mind up as to what I wanted. I've spent a lot of time thinking about that and, after last night – and a talk I had with Steffi here?" She challenged me with her eyes to say something, but I simply looked away from both women – mainly because it didn't seem to come as much of a surprise to Eileen.
When Joan saw that she wasn't getting anything negative from me she started up again. "As I said? I had a talk with Steffi here last night. I'll admit that I might not have said all that came out of me if I'd been sober all the way – but it dawned on me later that there's a lot to be said for the old saying 'in wine, the truth comes out'.
"Sounds like you hurt Steven's feelings." Eileen said calmly, "and I don't see much sense in that."
Joan actually reared back as if she'd been struck. "Hurt his feelings? I don't know about that." She looked over at me directly. "I may have humiliated him a little bit – but you really don't mind me doing that to you – do you darling?"
"Well I can't say I was happy about what you said." Then I looked at Eileen. "But she was honest Eileen – even though some of the things she said about me were kinda embarrassing."
Joan laughed. "Well PUT darling!" She turned to Eileen. "The upshot of everything aunt is that I want – expect – Steven here too become a nice, obedient, complacent, Steffi. Want him to become my wife. You know exactly what I want . ."
"That's not true Joan!" I still don't know what you want." Eileen interrupted quietly.
"I don't think I could have been any clearer Eileen!" Joan said huffily. "Thought I'd made my wishes perfectly clear! But I've been harboring the thoughts that you knew what I wanted. True?"
"Maybe. Let me ask this. You want your husband effeminized? Make him into a sweet little thing?"
"I thought I'd made that perfectly clear?"
Regardless of the fact that my face was a burning red, it was as if I wasn't there to either woman. They were facing each other.
"No. You did NOT!" Eileen responded. "I don't see much problem in turning him into the type of person that you want, but you haven't said WHEN. And you haven't said to WHAT LEVEL!"
"Oh!" Joan replied.
"Yes! I think that we're all aware that Steven – Steffi – may want what you want him to be – but do you want him in dresses – bras and suchlike – hair done and makeup? Is THAT what you want – and if so, how SOON? C'mon Joan! I've been advising you to make up your mind, but you have to be more definite than what you've been doing!"
"Hey! I don't want to disturb anyone – but I AM here, you know. Maybe I've got something to . ." I started with my face all red from what Eileen had been saying and insinuating.
Joan held her hand up and stopped me. "One more word out of you? Just ONE more word? I'll have you go stand in the corner. If that's what you want – say one word – even 'no' and I'll put you there. If you don't want to be treated like a naughty little girl? Shake your head! Other than that, stay quiet until us ladies stop talking. Now what do you want?"
I shook my head immediately seeing immediately that Joan was serious and knowing full well that I would end up doing whatever she told me. Even Eileen was looking at me impassively but with a great deal of curiosity, obviously waiting to see how I'd react. For the next thirty seconds I fixed my eyes on the table surface. Listened with ever increasing shame as Joan discussed with Eileen what was to be done with me.
"Going back to what you asked me Eileen? You make a very good point. I KNOW what I want. Unfortunately I can see now that you're NOT a mind reader. To be as succinct as possible, I'd like you to teach Steffi here, the feminine way of doing things and, as to the when? No hurry at all – in fact I'd like it spread out a bit. Think I would absolutely LOVE it when he did things voluntarily – but at the same time? Enjoy it when he makes a silly fuss and complains. To be honest? I don't know yet what level of femininity I want from him – but I think that only time will tell." She grinned. "I think that he'll know when I think that he needs to be a little more wifely towards me."
"So it would appear that you want him to do things voluntarily. Such as?"
Joan shrugged. "Attitude mostly, I guess. Though making himself absolutely hairless – putting on a wee bit perfume? That sort of thing." She smiled at me. "Just one thing important thing, dearest? Once you've done something like that? I certainly don't want you going back, so to speak. Say you start with lipstick? I'll expect lipstick on you – exactly the same amount a girl does. Do you think you understand that - darling?"
She didn't wait for any kind of answer from me but switched her attention back to Eileen. "I don't know if I mentioned it dear? But I think that Steffi should understand now that I put her in the classification of 'woman driver'. Don't want her driving unless it's positively necessary. Want you to drive her to and from work." Then she smiled. "Oh sheesh! I forgot something! Helen and I had a LONG chat last night while you and Veronica were busy, Steffi. She's perfectly willing for you to become a part-time worker at the office. From ten in the morning until two in the afternoon. Isn't that lovely? That way Eileen, can have some time to go shopping. Go to the beach – whatever. At the same time have PLENTY of time to train you, Steffi on how to look after a house – AND ME!"
I heard her loud and clear. Suddenly swallowed but managed to speak clearelky, although quietly. "Joan darling? May I ask something?"
She looked my way and her jaw dropped with delight. Held her hand up to halt me, then answered. "Of COURSE my darling! But why don't you come and sit on my knees while you ask?"
I felt like an idiot, but got up from my chair and went to her. She stayed in her chair, but pushed back to give me room. As she did so, she spoke to Eileen, but was well aware that I could hear.
"Did you HEAR that Eileen? Lovely! See that Steffi is picking up the proper way to talk to me already! Soft and sweet and deferential!" Then she spoke to me as I sat down on her knee and she put an arm around my shoulder. "Yes, Steffi darling?" Pulled my head back so that it rested on her shoulder.
It was difficult, as I felt I was talking to air, but I managed. "I'm sorry dear? But I thought you only wanted me to take an hour or so in the afternoon? Just enough to let me come home and help to make the house ready for you when you came home?" I hated the sound of my own submissive tone.
"Yes. That's right my little darling!" She kissed me then spoke again. "That's why I was so upset just now, realizing that you hadn't agreed – and I should have got your permission. But don't you agree that you just working four hours a day there is much better? It was actually Helen that suggested it! She's happy, and this way? You can work with Eileen for a much longer period each day. Learn that much more about being a housewife. This way, you don't have to work as much during the week end! Isn't that wonderful?"
I was able to glance at her smiling face ands shot a look at Eileen. She cocked her head at me in an unspoken question. I know that my smile was sickly as I answered Joan. "Yes dear. That sounds marvelous!"
She pulled me in again and kissed me soundly, her hand now possessively stroking my breast. When she lifted her head, she giggled at Eileen. "Wow! My little minx Steffi has got me all excited already. Sits like a girl. Talks like a girl!" She stroked my again. "And FEELS like a girl!"
Eileen grinned at her. "You two want to be alone?"
"No." Joan said regretfully. "I think I've said everything that needs to be said and need to get ready to face the day." She kissed me softly. "Happy darling?"
What was I supposed to do – argue? "Yes Joan." I tried to simper.
"I can tell! You are going to be SO happy! Think I'll go and get ready. Have breakfast for me in a half hour?" She patted my cheek, gently shoved me upright and went upstairs. I sat down at the table with a thump and took a sip of my coffee.
"Mmm." Eileen said. "I don't think there's much doubt as to what Joan wants now – is there?"
"Don't think so. But what am I going to do?" I asked forlornly.
"Seems to me that you don't have much choice." She shrugged. "Get your ass out of here at the first opportunity – or decide to stay and give me a hand to make breakfast. If I know Joan? I wouldn't stay around here too long." She shrugged again. "But it's up to you."
I sighed. "May as well start on breakfast I suppose."
"Do you mind if I start calling you Steffi?"
"I'd rather you didn't to tell you the truth."
"Dear? No offense, but if I keep on calling you Steve, Joan will probably get all mad at me – and I don't want that. So just bear with it for a while – it won't get too bad once you're used to it."
Breakfast went off without a hitch. Joan never eats a big breakfast – a half grapefruit, a few slices of buttered rye toast and a mug of strong black coffee. Eileen and I had boiled eggs and toast. Refreshed our coffee. There wasn't much said that I remember until Joan went upstairs then came back down, all ready to go out.
"I'll be gone most of the day girls, but should be back around fourish. If you want to Eileen? I'd suggest that you start showing Steffi how to make a bed – then the two of you can maybe go grocery shopping. Buy whatever you want, but I'd suggest you keep it simple – so that you can start teaching Steffi some rudimentary cooking. But other than that? Take it easy."
"Sounds like a winner to me!" Eileen laughed. "I like the idea of a an easy day. I haven't been bothered by jet lag yet, but a day lolling around might be a good idea."
"Oh? And if the two of you feel like it? You might invite Veronica over for coffee or a chat. Evelyn told me that Veronica feels as if she doesn't have enough friends." She turned laser-like eyes on me. "Veronica would be a GREAT model for you Steffi – you can maybe pick her brains on ALL sorts of things!" Then she looked at her watch. "But I have to get going. Bye girls!"
We said our goodbyes and away she went in a cloud of confident well-being. Once the house was quiet again, Eileen looked at me over her coffee cup. "You can tell me if you want to Steffi, but did I detect some hidden meaning in what Joan was saying about Veronica?" She looked at me astutely.
I could feel the gulp as it passed down my throat. Let the air out explosively from my chest. "Aw shit Eileen! She thinks that I can get tips from Veronica."
"About what exactly? Something that I can't help you on?"
My lips were awfully dry and I licked them. Lied a little because things were embarrassing enough and I knew that Joan wanted me to check with Veronica about how I should make spanking me a fun foreplay for sex. So I procrastinated. "Some ideas on how to make a dominant woman happy." I said this as if it were of no consequence.
"Ah!" She said. "Makes sense. But shall we get going?"
At the same time, I wasn't sure if she believed me.
Her bed was made already, but I almost fainted when we both went up to my bedroom. WHAT an untidy mess! It took me a moment to realize that I had become used to Joan doing all of the tidying up. It now seemed that she was making sure that I understood that it was now MY job! Eileen stood by as she made sure that I knew how to tidy up a room – and make a bed. Let's face it. It wasn't THAT hard! In no time flat, Eileen looked on approvingly as I finished up.
The rest of the morning went quickly as Eileen and I went grocery shopping. I hadn't realized how much there was too it, but once she explained how she had the menus for the next week in her head – regarding the main meals of course – and the incidentals for breakfast and lunch? I caught on. Not ALL of it of course, but I got the idea. It just seemed so RIGHT somehow, that we had a nice lunch together at a local restaurant. Had to admit that I enjoyed myself. It was SO relaxing!
I can't say that I was so relaxed when Veronica jumped at the chance of joining us that afternoon, but the few hours before Joan got home did stretch out. She turned up quickly, and joined us. Eileen didn't waste any time in explaining what the situation was. To my disquiet, she didn't seem disturbed at all. She examined me from her part of the table where se had a soft drink.
"I can see where Joan is coming from. But you DO need quite a lot of work."
"Come ON! Less of the macho bullshit, huh?" She was laughing though. "I can help you though – if you want, but you'd better think things out. I'll help of you want, but don't give me a bunch of static."
"But I'm LOST!" I said. "I can't really tell what Joan wants me to do . ."
"C'MON Steffi!" Eileen laughed. "You know perfectly well! She wants you to be her girl! What more do you think?"
"Yeah!" Veronica laughed. "Okay. Let me see if I'm right. Joan wants you, Steffi, to start acting and being like her girl. Right?"
"Yeah. That's about it!" I said. "But…"
"Enough 'Buts' already!" Veronica interrupted. "Your problem Steffi is that Joan hasn't told you where to STOP! You don't want to do any more than is necessary. That what it is?"
I nodded. "I think you have it – in a nutshell!" I looked at Eileen. "Everybody seems to think that I'm sort of pansy. Will jump at ANYTHING that effeminizes me! And that's not true! This kind of stuff embarrasses me!"
"So? You don't want to do anything that shows. Still right?" Veronica queried.
I sighed in agreement.
"Well, let me say something and see if you agree." Veronica asked.
She thought as she marshaled her thoughts then started to talk. "Seems to me that even if you don't want to start doing what Joan wants, that you know you HAVE to do something – right?"
"I guess so."
"So let me ask you this. You think that you'd better do something every day along those lines."
"Well I'm hoping not every day!" I blurted.
"But you're thinking of fighting?"
I could feel my shoulders droop. "That'd be kinda silly I think."
Veronica smiled sympathetically. "Now you're being realistic. Evelyn gets a wild hair up her ass about something now and then – and it just doesn't pay me to fight it."
"So what do you do?" I asked with real curiosity.
She laughed. "Generally PROVE to her that I have no objections . .
"So what does THAT get you?" I interrupted.
"Peace and quiet! If I fight her, I get nothing but trouble day and night – and eventually give in. From that point on, it's a real BITCH for me to undo that. She keeps an eagle eye on me."
She smiled at me. "No offense dear, but I use a bit of female trickery. If she wants 'A'? I promptly tell her how wonderful it is – and go ahead and do A, and B and maybe even C!"
"Lot of good that . ." I started bitterly.
"Hush Steffi! Listen UP!" Eileen said. "She's trying to teach you something!"
Veronica gave her a grateful glance. "Steffi? This way, I maybe do something for a week or two, then drop C – then B, then A! And Evelyn usually doesn't notice!"
"Aha!" I said, the light finally dawning on me. "You're suggesting that I do even more than Joan expects at first – and maybe she won't push so hard for other things – and in the long run, I might even be able to go back to the way I am right now?"
"Well, I don't know if I'd go that far!" Eileen said. "But face it Steffi – Joan wants you to basically change your personality. You fight her and she'll get all dogmatic on you and gradually make you change everything. Do more than just go along at the beginning – and she just may back off in some things."
"Makes sense!" I agreed. "You ladies have anything on your minds?"
Veronica looked at her watch. "I think that we might have just enough time if we hurry!"
# # #
To say that I wasn't embarrassed that night would be a lie, but Eileen had worked on my meeting with Joan a number of times and this helped a lot. At the same time, there was an excitement inside me that I wouldn't have admitted for the world.
When I heard Joan let herself in late in the afternoon, I went to meet her. Remembering full well the way she had greeted me in the past was very little problem. Made sure that my pristine half apron swished about me just a little as I hurried and welcomed her. Smiled happily. "Hello darling! Time you got home!" made sure that I offered up my lips for a kiss rather than attempted to take the male position.
I could sense the fact that she was a little disappointed as she surreptitiously checked my face for makeup. Knew immediately that she didn't see my fingernails – but smiled to myself – she'd know about them soon enough. Disappointed or not, she was still pleased enough by my attitude – the perfect wife greeting her husband. She kissed me firmly.
"Hi sweetie!" She greeted me when she had finished. "Been up to anything today?"
"Oh YES!" I answered enthusiastically. "Eileen taught me how to make a bed properly! Then we went shopping for groceries! Then?" I acted as if I'd forgotten something. "Oh yes! That's it! She and Veronica and I? We all went and got a pedicure and a manicure! It was SUCH fun!"
She blinked. "A what and a what?" Let me SEE!"
Blushing, I held out my right hand. She examined it.
"My goodness! I'd never realized that you had such small hands – and whoever worked on your nails? They've done a lovely job! They're SO nice and oval! Almost make me jealous!" She laughed happily. "But I notice you've only got clear polish on them? Don't you think that a nice pink would help to set them off?"
"Aw come ON Joan!" Eileen's voice came from behind us. "The poor dear did very well! Can you imagine his feelings going into a beauty salon with Veronica and me – and getting a pedicure AND a manicure? Be fair!"
"Oh! I'm very sorry dear!" Joan said to me letting go of my hand, but a glint of pleasure shone in her eyes as she asked "Was it awfully bad?"
I knew that this was a loaded question and I had to be very careful in my answer. "Yes – it was embarrassing sitting there amongst a whole bunch of women (which was something of a lie as the shop hadn't been so busy that they couldn't take the three of us on short notice) but?" I dropped my head as if to admit something that would please Joan. "It WAS quite nice being pampered in that way."
She was pleased, I could tell. Pulled me close to her and gave me a nice, sexy, kiss. I thought she was going to go back to my adventures in the beauty salon, so brought up another subject the minute she stopped kissing me. "And guess what Joan! Eileen showed me how to make dessert! She is cooking most of the dinner – but the dessert is mine! (I didn't have to act my pleasure at this – it was largely true).
"Not just a pretty face – are you my darling?" Joan teased, then added. "But would you like to mix me a drink dear? I'd KILL for a nice big, Scotch, right now!"
"Coming right up dear! You go and sit down and I'll have your drink there in less that two seconds!"
She gave me a smile as she headed for the sitting room. Eileen winked at me as I hurried to the bar. "You did GREAT!" she whispered. I blushed.
Everything was fine from then on. Dinner was a success with my dessert getting rave reviews from Joan. To be honest, it was really simple – with banana, sugar, and lime mixed together, then some of the mixture put in wonton skins then deep fried and put on ice cream. With Eileen watching over me it was delicious!
After dinner I watched TV and Eileen did some crocheting. Joan wanted to catch up on some real estate law, so disappeared into the office for most of the night, only showing up for a nightcap just before bed time. I told her to put her glass away before coming to bed, then hastened to the bedroom. I was ready for her when she came to bed. I actually felt a tremor go through me as I heard her come up the stairs, then say goodnight to Eileen before coming into the bedroom. I was wearing my satin pajamas, robe, and slippers
"Something wrong?" She asked.
"N..N..No." I stammered. "Why?" I held up her hairbrush. "I thought you'd want your hair brushed."
"I do. But you look all funny. Why are you blushing so hard?"
I'd been standing with the bed in between us. Now I came out from behind its cover and faced her. Kicked off my slippers to reveal my feet.
"Mmmm! My goodness!" She laughed. "You WERE busy this afternoon, weren't you? That shade of red on your toenails is lovely! Do it just for me?"
"Yes." I managed with a gulp. "Like it?"
"Silly! Of course I do! Now come. Undress me, then brush my hair." She gave me a lordly smile as she came and stood in front of me.
How can I explain the feelings that coursed through me as I undressed her, gradually removing layer by layer to reveal the lithe, strong, goddess that was underneath the clothes, then stood stock still as she faced me eye to eye. I then clothed this goddess in her nightly gown and after she sat down, brushed her hair.
To my discomfort, her hand snaked backwards and caressed me, feeling the texture of my skin underneath my pajamas.
"Mmmm?" she said after a while. "Do I detect a difference here?'
I couldn't help but giggle. "Veronica had some depilatories she suggested I use." I replied.
"Lovely! Make you nice and smooth! Like this?" She asked suddenly, her hand taking a hold of my erection.
"Oh Joan." Was all I could say.
End of Part 5