Been thinking. There seems to be a major gap between the generations about music that is popular at any one particular time. I, for one, have very eclectic taste. I enjoy classical, semi-classical, and popular music. Liked Bing Crosby, then Frank Sinatra. Never cared much for Elvis - rooted for Pat Boone at that time, who I learned to actively dislike many yerars later - though I never took to Elvis.
Took me a while, but I learned to enjoy the Beatles. Elton John? Liked some of his piano playing, but that was about it. Today's music? Don't have a bloody clue. Detest Rap. Probably can't tell you one tune that's been anywhere in the top 100 for many years. But I can still remember "Polka Dots and Moonbeams": "Stranger on the Shore" (Acker Bilt): The theme from "Picnic": "Boogie Woogie" (Tommie Dorsey) - but all of this just seems to point to the fact that I'm bloody old!
And feminine names? They seem to be creatures of fashion, just like music. What happened to the Margaret's, Dorothy's, Anne's of my past? It now seems to be Breanne's, Ashleys, and a whole bunch that gives me problems figuring out the gender.
Looking back? I was always a sucker for a few names. PRISCILLA! Can you imagine a more feminine name? Pamela is nice as well. I'd say that I liked "P" names - but Penelope? Always had a helluva time pronouncing it correctly. Liked Melissa - and Rose.
When I wrote, I always had a bad time fantasizing about names that were 'assigned' to my heroes by their dommes - and now, in the interests of courtesy I have a very bad time in addressing correspondence to sissies and cross dressers! In many cases, I don't know whether to address someone as 'he' or 'she'. Can't say I even like the expression 'gurls', so I keep getting stuck because there are a fair amount who still buy my stories - and I often don't know what in hell's name to call them!
I'm not going to go into my own feminine name. Don't particularly see much femininity in it - but I picked it for practical reasons.
When I started writing for publication - away back - it was for Nifty Archives (remember them? Bastards!). I was SO excited to be published. Don't think I'd even picked a name for myself. I'd send them a story - and as soon as it was published - I'd send another. It was fantastic! Probably published about eight stories. Then I was going on vacation. Made the awful mistake of writing (politely) and asking if I could send two or three stories in for publication.
I got one of the nastiest letters back pointing out what 'rules' I was trying to break - and that my writing was SO bad, that it was given to the junior editors as a punishment!
I am a very vocal, bad tempered person, but I was without words. I didn't know if I was any good - but I knew I wasn't THAT bad. Never answered the diatribe. Looked around and found a Dutchman - forgot his name - but a lovely man who didn't charge me a dime to set me up a web page. I think it was about then I took the name and titled the page "Bea's TV Channel". I didn't have that many stories at the time - but - and this is honest - I had a counter - and it blew at 1,000,000 within three months! (Once I could see that I wasn't as bad as Nifty thought I was, I wrote and asked that they delete my stories. They replied that they would be glad to do this - as long as I sent an equal amount of stories to replace them. I never sent another word to Nifty)
But getting back to my Dutchman? I was SO incensed when he referred to me as "one of his girls"! At that time I considered myself a transvestite - nothing else - I hadn't yet figured out that I'm submissive - and ONLY to women. The thought that another man was referring to me as a girl just about drove me nuts! Yet - at the same time, he was doing me a very large favor and calling myself "Bea". I had to admit that he had some grounds! I address many of the people who buy my stories in what I imagine are their feminine names - often wonder if they're pissed off the way I was. But some enjoy it I think.
This started out as a quick note. Guess I got carried away - but I'm just curious how we manage to pick names for ourselves. Some girl we were frightened of when we were kids?
A point that's away from this topic. I want to thank the people who are giving me 'reactions' at the bottom of each post. I really DO appreciate it. I'd prefer Comments - but a reaction is a helluva lot better than nothing - so DO take the time to give me SOME feedback - huh?
Its been my observation that quite a few of us simply feminise our male names e.g. adding an "a" to Paul we have Paula. There is however some thing quite appealing about the idea of being named by another, after all why should a sissy choose her own name?. Must confess I'd be thrilled to be renamed Priscilla or Violet or Cynthia, Pansy has connotations, Agnes or Daisy such fine names for maids.
ReplyDeleteInteresting to hear Niftys opinion of your writings, perhaps tis rather the cut of your Jib than your style that offends them. Having read one or two online stories I'd rate them quite high in their literary merit but sadly lacking in "gayness" and there perhaps lies the problem with Nifty. Madam! the proof of the pudding is, as they say, in the eating and your pudding seems to have gone over a treat.
Best Wishes
Athena (feel free to rename moi)
With the handle Bea, I can kinda understand why someone might mistakenly identify you as a girl. To be honest, for the same reason, I experienced my share of confusion over what gender to refer to you as at first.
ReplyDeleteI remember what might have been the first time I wrote to you, when you wrote back, you tested out some girl's name on me. It wasn't that I minded so much as I wasn't sure how to respond, and I think just by addressing it, I ended up sounding like I was overanalyzing the thing.
When necessity required me to pick a female pseudonym, I won't say I didn't put a considerable amount of thought into it, but ended up just going with something simple, derived from my initials.
I might feel a little funny about being referred to by a girl's name all the time.
To Athena: Shouldn't that be,'The poof is in the pudding!'
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