First of all - Tammie. She's a guy most of the time - so doesn't have built in breasts or stuff like that - but she's the happiest TV I've ever seen on camera. Not that I'm jealous of course - I simply get a little peeved that I couldn't look like that with a gang working on me. First of all a few photos (Note the book!) :
I mean to say! I bare my soul about all of the trauma I go through for ONE pair of shoes - and she says how easy it is to buy them on the Internet. I ask you!
But I see that I'm starting to get some comments from various sources - which is GREAT and why I started this blog in the first place. But one thing happened that I didn't expect. It got ME thinking. Delving into my psyche is more like it.
In one of my previous posts I was discussing aprons - and how they turned me on. Waxed poetical about the aprons that Lucy wore. But another stated opinion made me think. After some cogitation, it finally dawned on me. I'm submissive to females - and it is the SITUATION that turns me on - the type of apron is purely secondary.
In a story I was a pecuniary drop out. I'd been miserable to my (since divorced) wife. She had ended up as a head housekeeper at a large house. After pleading from me she allowed me to join the household as a temporary librarian while the owners were gone. The maids that worked for her were contry girls - on the chubby side. My ex-wife found that she enjoyed having me in an apron similar to the 'other girls'. That was the beginning and humiliating - but it was worsened when she had me in PRETTY aprons - made the other girls jealous - and now I was put in a situatation where a whole BUNCH of women disliked me - and wanted to humiliate me even more! (Takes deep, calming, breath!)
See what I mean? Surely I can't be alone?
I guess we're all different - all unique - so there probably isn't just one cause of our desires nor one explanation of the role clothes play in our imaginations. For me, the apron is a key element in my dressing, I think, because it is an obvious outward sign of femininity and subservience. It's like a billboard announcing to the world at large that I am inferior, fit only to serve.
ReplyDeleteI heard a psychologist discussing some crossdreser's need to be humiliated who suggested that it was a way for the subject to deal with what he most fears and dreads. A person who was humiliated constantly as a child might subconsciously seek to disempower or deflect such humiliation by surrendering to it entirely and, as it were, surviving the experience.
Whatever the cause, Tammie might show us the way to be happy - by accepting and enjoying without guilt the calm and well being that dressing can bring.
Couldn't agree more. But must admit that I spent a lot of my adult life 'wondering' what caused me to think the way I do.
ReplyDeleteFinally - and this was VERY hard and took a long time - accepted myself for the way I am. Started feeling good about the fact that I wished nobody any harm - and the only person I wanted to humiliate was myself - MUCH better than being a rapist, sadist, or paedophile.
A lot of CD's are not into femdom. They just do it out of love of crossdressing. I have met a lot of gurls like that over the years. We are a complicated lot, and there's so many different ways to bifurcate us. I'm glad we're all different, unique and beautiful. There are many different ways to be happy, many different reasons to be happy. But happiness is an art. For most of us, it has to be learned. My moods come and go, but most of the time I'm unhappy. No real reason why, it's just my personality. I keep trying, though.
ReplyDeleteWell, yes, the apron is exciting because it is a symbol of subjugation, so to speak. This is a point that was also very much highlighted in Apron Strings, when it was still running.
ReplyDeleteTruthfully, I'm surprised that you only come up with this realization now, because in your stories, reducing the hero's position - either in the office or in his home - plays as an important role in his feminization as do his clothes.
PS: Tammie looks fantastic on the picture. Does she have a blog or a website with more of such photos?
Hi Rosie, thanks for the kind words, I don't have a blog or site, although I am on crossdressers.com and have posted some pics there, as "tammietoo". I will send a few more to Bea to use here if she wants.
ReplyDelete